Rev Martina Schmidt's Blog

Tree from My Yard- July 23, 2010   The last few months have been challenging ones due to one recurring pattern that has asked for my attention.  I have been experiencing a lot of unnecessary fear about what certain people are thinking about me.  This is pretty atypical behavior since I am usually very grounded in self love. I recognized, because of the nature of the work I do being a healer/counselor, that something I had buried deep in my consciousness was rising up to be explored, understood and released.  I literally used the words "I need to uproot this old pattern of fear and move on" when discussing it with my husband. My suffering came from making assumptions.  I found myself taking simple statements and reading into them, and not in a pleasant way.  I was afraid of being judged, rejected or seen as "bad" by the people I loved.  It was causing palpitations and gut churning experiences for me.  My body was shouting at me to chan...

I found this wonderful young lady who has done as I desire to do- brought her art to others to inspire them and remind them of their inherent value. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! While watching this video I felt mesmerized by the flow of the paints and the ease of the process for her. As I sat with this, I reflected on how the title "there is nothing wrong with you" is also reflected in her creating freely and without reservation- just letting it happen, no mistakes. I asked myself, how much more enjoyable could my life be if I lived it the same way? Knowing I cannot make a mistake. Knowing that if I "do" or "say" something that doesn't look and feel pretty to me, I can offer another color, or perspective and transform it with love into something deeper, something beautiful. I can apologize and create something new, something more honest and honoring. But to keep moving forward, to keep painting, coloring my world, I must remember "there is ...

When I watch this video it makes my whole body smile. To be a witness to the magic of those who truly desire to inspire us. As I watched the dancers I asked myself- what is it they are hoping to offer to those watching? I was sure it was magic, hope, joy. And as I watched the faces of the observers and my own face I could see and feel the gift was received. This reminds me of why a part of me will always love Disney World.

Yesterday morning I woke up excited. I have come to love Mondays as my two dear friends spend this day with me creating art.  I smiled all morning as I carried the boxes of glue, glitter, stamps, papers of every color and paints up from the basement to my dining room table.  I brewed the iced tea and put out the chocolate chip cookies and waited by the window. Both of my friends arrived together and I hurried out to help them lug in the various containers of art supplies they had decided were a "must have" for our gathering. We giggled and hugged and practically skipped inside to start our day. As we cut, painted and rubbed inks onto all different projects we opened our hearts and talked. Every so often one of us would hold up our project with pride and would receive praise and applause or we would show our "mistakes" and be told with a smile "I think it looks great!" In these few short hours all the hurts of my past week, all the disappointments, hi...

I have been enjoying reading so many blogs this month and wishing I could put my words to paper as eloquently as those I have been reading. Mostly I have been inspired by a blog I read by dreamphemera about relationships.  My chin was on the table at how precisely I felt she had put all of my confusion into a deeper, clearer perspective.   I gained the most in recognizing who and what I want from my own friendships and what I do not want to have to agree to anymore. As a child I was taught to include everyone in my life, my sacred space of me, or God will be disappointed.  This,  I believe was an expanded truth from my mother, sunday school teachers, etc. of the Golden Rule- which I have now revisited.  To treat another as I would chose to be treated is a truth for me that reflects my desire to treat myself the way I want to be treated and to be an example of that for others.  If I am unthoughtful of my time, energy and needs- so too will others b...