(Today's Blog is dedicated to my cousin & Soul friend Michael C.)
I knew I would like her the minute she walked into the waiting room. Her black cowboy boots with hot pink angel wings and sparkles made me smile.
"Thank you" I silently whispered to God.
It was a simple message, in Soul words- "She will understand you".
It's been over 6 years since I've been to the doctor. Yes, I know some of you women are gasping at the lack of yearly physicals, etc. but..... that's my choice. I'm a nature girl all the way. I have no need for a pap, or breast exam- no matter what the fear of the world is around me. Why? Because if cancer where to enter my world- I would simply keep living the loving nourishing way I have been for the last six weeks, and if that didn't do the trick.... I'd allow myself to move onto the next adventure in the next world. Death has NO fear for me. I trust it's timing, no matter what.
So for me to visit the doctor- it has to be to try to improve the quality of my life- not the length of it. And so, when I found Dr. Sina, following my Soul's Intuition I was thrilled to find a beautiful vibrant 50 something woman with cowboy boots and a biochemistry, MD, and naturopathic mastery.
I had to wait six weeks to see her- but if you've read my blogs lately- you understand why I made the commitment to go.
The visit was beautiful and overwhelming at the same time. Yes, indeed it was a good thing I went. My body is asking for some serious healing time from all the years of overgiving and overworking. I have to pay the piper. But mostly, I can feel my beautiful body like an innocent child who has worked tirelessly to help me accomplish what I came here to do. Now it's her time to repair.
So, after an hour of testing, talking and listening to the evidence of my body's exhaustion. I felt slightly overwhelmed by it all. How could I let myself get to this place? How could I push and push and push and expect it to be any different? Was I arrogant in believing I could override nature? Yes, I had been. Time to learn. Time for humility and deeper understanding of self.
So Today I took a love bath.... I let love pour itself through me and over me with silent healing presence. I sat in meditation and surrendered. It is the most gentle and most powerful force of healing there is. I have let it flow through me for others more times than I can count. So today I turned it's focus inward. I contained it and gave it to myself, simply by doing nothing but letting it bathe me, washing away my deep layers of sadness, my fears of failing, my need to do it alone, and my impatience. All of it handed over to Love.
On my walk today I replaced my upbeat, get your ass moving Maroon5 music with a beautiful love song to myself. Today I share it with you- so that you too can take a love bath if you'd like.
I realize you may not have the hour to meditate and take a walk, but if you could even sit for 3 mins and Let love in...... let it hold you, and fill you and wash away all the